mindset

  • Blog, mindset, Uncategorized

    How to stop the mid-year goal panic

    So today I woke up and realised it was the middle of the year!

    Seriously…where did the first half of this year go?

    I don’t know about you but in my head it was Christmas like 5 minutes ago!

    Want to know how I realised it was nearly July?

    My social media feed was crammed full of ‘we’re half way through the year, have you completed your goals yet’ posts.

    Now, I know that these are all well meaning posts but sometimes when I see posts like that all it does it create a bit of a panic inside me that I’ve been wasting my time or that I’m no-where near where I want to be…even if I’ve had a great year so far.

    I know I’m not the only one.

    So if you’re reading this and thinking ‘OMG the year is half way gone and I’ve nothing to show for it so far,’ don’t worry. I’ve got you.

    1) Know that you can literally start again at any point

    You don’t have to wait until a Monday, the start of the month, your birthday, New Years or a New Moon to start afresh…any day works for that. So, if you’re not where you want to be right now just make a decision to get started from today…it all works.

    2) Simplify your goals

    A big part of my job is sitting down with amazing business owners who come to me with all of their goals that feel like a tangled ball of wool in their head. I then untangle the hypothetical knot, and lay down 3 strands in front of them and say ‘focus on that’ they breathe a huge sigh of relief and get started and amazing results follow.

    I know from years of experience that so often we make things a lot more complicated than we need to…and one of the ways we do this is through our goal planning. I know there’s loads you want to do…but for now, pick a max of 3 things. Just 3 things to focus on for the next 6 months. That’s it.

    You’ll feel much lighter, you’ll have more time AND you’ll get results faster.

    3) Focus on how you want to FEEL

    Want to know a secret?

    Every single time I have a meeting with a client they mention the F word….FEEL

    ‘I feel as though….’

    ‘I feel like…’

    It pops up every single time without fail.

    Yet, we don’t often give how we want to FEEL any focus when we’re looking at our business.

    We look at money and clients and so many other things…but feelings???

    Never!!

    But this is what enables you to show up motivated, and happy and energised….when you’re not feeling great you don’t.

    It’s that simple!

    So, how do you want to FEEL by the end of the year?

    AND…what tweaks can you make to feel like that?

    SAVE YOUR SPACE ON THE SMASH YOUR OWN CEILING MINI MIND

  • Blog, mindset

    3 tips to stop resisting, whatever it is you’re resisting?

    About three months ago I decided to put some structure into how I manage my working week. Now I’d always resisted this because I told myself that I don’t like structure that I like spontaneity. That I had to be available for my clients, that any kind of structure would dampen my creativity. So I resisted it for a long time until I decided I had to create a structure that was right for me.

    And you know what? It worked an absolute dream.

    Which leads me to ask the question to you – what are you resisting and why are you resisting it?

    Now, chances are that you can put your finger on it immediately because resistance feels a little bit uncomfortable.


    I’ve got a few tips for you because I have a theory that when we resist something, chances are it is going to benefit us.


    Tip #1- Ask yourself what is it that you’re resisting

    You are probably going to be able to put your finger on it. If not then write it down in a notebook and see what comes up for you.


    Tip #2 Ask yourself what’s your reason for resisting it?

    You might find some stories that you’ve been telling yourself popping up. See what excuses pop up. What messages you’re telling yourself and see what happens.


    Tip #3 – Create an experiment

    I’m not the type of person that will tell you to dive in to do something because if it works for me, it’ll work for everybody. But, I do encourage people to test and measure things for themselves. Create a little mini-experiment and see how it works. Tweak things, adapt things, move things around, make it work for you.


    Those are my three tips for stopping the resistance. I’d love to hear your comments. Let me know what you are resisting and if you’ve got any tips that you can share.

     

    If you’d like to grab your FREE WORKBOOK on 7 ways you’re blocking your own success and what to do about it click here 

     

     

     

     

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  • Blog, mindset

    Stop with the excuses

    One thing that I see an awful lot of is when amazing people get fantastic opportunities that might be a little bit out of their comfort zone. Instead of putting their hands up and saying I would love to have a go at that, they find themselves coming up with an excuse why they can’t.

    Here are some tips for you if you find yourself in that position.


    Tip #1 – Listen out for the excuse

    Next time something comes up or next time you feel like doing something, and you find yourself coming up with an excuse or a reason, try and spot what that excuse is and write it down. Make a note of it because chances are it’s going to be coming up time and time again.

     

    Tip #2 – Ask yourself if it’s really true

    You’ve got to be really honest with yourself here. Ask yourself if it’s true, or is it just an excuse. You have to tune in and listen to yourself because you’ll secretly know. Now if it’s the truth, fair enough, you don’t have to do everything. You can just write it down and say I’m going to come back to it when the time is right. If you’re just lying to yourself then be honest and lean into that conversation with yourself.

     

    Tip #3 – Decide what the next small steps would be

    Now, if you’ve been hanging out with me for a while, you’ll know that I’m a massive believer in not disregarding the small steps. You don’t climb a mountain in one leap. It’s a series of small steps that gets you there.


    I would welcome your comments. So let me know what works for you, which are the tips you prefer. I’d love to know what tips you’ve got for getting you past excuses. And I’d also love to know what your favourite excuse is. Let me know in the comments and I will see you next week.

     

    If you’d like to grab your FREE MASTERCLASS on how you’re blocking your own success click here.

  • Blog, mindset

    How to stop comparing yourself to others

    Comparing yourself to others is really common because we’ve got access to other people’s lives via social media. And if we’re not careful, we can fall into the trap of comparing where we are to where somebody else is and feeling envious or jealous. You might question your ability, your value.

     

    Tip #1 – Spot yourself comparing as it’s happening


    What you might find is that you start seeing it after the event. That’s fine, but let’s start raising that self-awareness. After some time you may be able to spot that you are comparing as it happens.

     

    Tip #2 – Write a list of all the things that you find that you are envious of


    Write a list of the things that you wish that you had that this person is experiencing. That will give you a shopping list. You can add that to your vision board or your goal list and you can start working towards it yourself.

     

    Tip #3 – Thank them for showing you the way


    Now, this might be a little bit of a tricky one. You don’t have to phone them up and thank them. But in your head you can thank them and think, I’m so pleased that somebody showing me that I can have all those things. I can achieve those things because you’re actually doing it and somebody always has to go first.


    Change your mindset and reframe it from feeling envious to feeling grateful.

     

    Tip #4 – Focus on service


    You’re going first for other people. You’re ahead of other people and they’ll be looking at you, whether you realize it or not, and thinking, look at them they’re doing so well and I want to do well.


    So focus on service, on giving back, on serving your clients, on serving your team and the people around you.


    Focus on how other people can get there too, so you’re helping other people along the way.


    Those are my tips for how to stop comparing yourself to others. I would love to see your comments. So let me know what your experiences are and if you’ve got any tips that you’d like to share about how you’ve got over comparing yourself to other people then we’d love to hear from you.

     

    If you’d like to grab your FREE WORKBOOK on 7 ways you’re blocking your own success and what to do about them click here

  • Blog, mindset

    5 ways to stop waiting for an invitation?

    Have you ever been in the position where you see other people smashing it out of the park, and you’re still in exactly the same place?

    You look over and wonder…

    “How did they get that opportunity and I didn’t?”

    ‘How did they get chosen or picked?”

    “Who do they know that I don’t?”

    I was having this very same conversation with someone the other day, when they found themselves in exactly the same position, and the fact of the matter is that chances are that the one thing the other person isn’t doing, that maybe you are is waiting for an invitation.

    The thing is I see this so often with the people I work with (and I have to say that I’ve been there myself) that instead of looking and asking for the opportunities, they’re waiting patiently for someone to come and invite them to take part. To do things like:

    …speak at that event!

    …be on that amazing podcast!

    …write a post for that popular website!

    …speak up in that meeting!

    …go for that promotion!

    And although, yes, sometimes that invitation does happen, most of the time especially when you’re trying to get some traction, you have to be the one to make your own opportunities and go after the things that you want to do.

    So, if this is where you’re at, I’ve got you covered…try these 5 tips.

    Decide what’s on your dream list

    First things first, you need to decide what you’d like to do. Is there something that you’d love to be part of? If so, it’s time to make a list. It’s so much easier to go for what you want, if you know exactly where you’re going. Here’s a hint…if you keep writing it as a goal, you keep talking about it, or you find yourself envying anyone who’s done it – chances are you should be aiming for it too.

    Do your research

    Once you know exactly what you’d love to be involved in, it’s time to do your research.
    What are they looking for?
    What are the submission guidelines?
    Who is the organiser?
    How do you get involved?
    Knowing all of this first, will make it so much easier to get the yes that you’re looking for.

    Ask

    This can often be the hardest step of all as it involves stepping out of your comfort zone and ‘putting yourself out there’ – but as the saying goes “if you don’t ask, you don’t get!”

    Watch out for your excuses, assumptions and blocks

    Be super aware of any blocks popping up round about now to stall or stop you in your tracks. Have you got an excuse why you can’t move forward? Are you suddenly too busy? Are you making an assumption why you can’t do it? Is it on your to do list as something you’ll do tomorrow? If so, check in with yourself to see how you feel. It’s OK and perfectly natural to feel nervous about taking action, especially if it’s something you’ve not done before – but remember ‘confidence comes from action.’

    Take the next small step

    As you’ve probably heard me say a thousand times, you don’t climb a mountain in one leap – so don’t freak yourself out by trying to get everything done straight away. Instead look for that next small step to keep you taking action until you’ve achieved your goal, and give yourself a deadline for when each small step should be finished.

    I’d love to hear your thoughts, let me know in the comments – and if you’re ready to take the next steps join me on the next 5 day Smash Your Own Ceiling Mindset Challenge.

  • Blog, mindset

    The Power of Consistency

    One thing that I see a lot of is business owners fall into this pattern or scenario of starting things and stopping them and starting them and stopping them and starting and stopping and not being consistent. I see this in all areas of business, but I’m going to pick on communication as being the main one that we’ll talk about today.

    Instead of being consistent, you do it for a little while and then you lose the habit and it falls by the wayside. Does this sound like something you do? Because if so, you are not alone.

    There is real magic in consistency because it’s like having that snowball effect. It might be tough to start with but it gathers momentum then opportunities come your way and people start to notice you and remember your message. That’s when you start to get the results that you’re looking for.


    Three Tips to stay consistent

    Tip #1 – Decide what adds value to your business

    Pick one thing. It’s harder to build up a habit when you try to do all the things. Whether that’s sending a newsletter out each week, or a podcast, or a blog post or whatever is for you.


    Tip#2 – Decide how it adds value

    What is the benefit of doing that every single week? What results do you want from it? What are you expecting? How do you want people to see you showing up? So put some meat on the bones here, what does it look like for you? Why do you want to do this one thing?


    Tip #3 – Decide on a day that it will happen every week

    Create a system for you to put that out into the world every week. Put it into your calendar that this is your day for doing that thing. Hold yourself accountable for this to make it into a habit that you do every single week.

    Bonus Tip – Batch your content

    It’s so much easier when you’re not having to create it every single week. Create three months’ worth of content all in one sitting. Then all you have to do is pick it up and drop it into place when that time comes.

    I hope this has been useful to you. I’d love to know in the comments where you fall down in your consistency, what tips you’ve got to help other people out and what works for you.

    If you’d like to grab your FREE MASTERCLASS on how you’re blocking your own success click here.

  • Blog, mindset, Uncategorized

    Why Mindset Matters To Your Business

    It matters because it is money left on the table.

    All the tiny decisions you make each day matter because not all these add value to your business. Concentrating on the high ticket tasks that may take longer, or stretch you, or make you feel uncomfortable but add value to your business.

    Whether you choose option A (the high ticket task) or option B (the easy task) is why mindset is so important. If you are choosing option B, is it because you’re uncomfortable about option A? It might take more of your time. It might make you feel a bit more uncomfortable. It might be a stretch. You might be doubting yourself at that moment in time. How do we stay laser-focused in your business so that you’re not letting your mindset run the show?

    Tip #1 Divide your to-do list in two

    I’m a huge fan of a to-do list and that’s because they work. But, the problem that I’ve seen with to-do lists is that we can get into the trap of just writing everything down. If we’re not careful, we fall into the trap of just doing the quick things every single day. The easy things, the things that we can cross off. We leave the meatier tasks, the ones that we just talked about that do pack a big punch to another day. But that other day might never come. And then you might end up with the same goals year after year after year if you’re not careful.

    This is why dividing your to-do list comes into play. Have a to-do list with everything on it. Then create what I call a leap list, which is where you put your high ticket tasks. I’d recommend choosing one a day or a couple, two or three a week. Tasks that you’re going to focus on at that time. These are the tasks that will leap you forward, that will propel you forward. These are the ones that will get you in front of people, that will improve your visibility, which will get you the clients that you want. These are the ones that will actually get money in the bank.


    Tip #2 – Do your leap task first every single day

    Whatever it is that you’ve written down on your leap list, you do that first. Before you dive into social media, before you go onto your inbox, before you start messing about with your website. Before you start doing all the simple tasks on your to-do list, you work on your leap task first. This will ensure that it’s always getting the attention that it needs, and you’ll get it finished much faster.


    Tip #3 Challenge your own thinking

    Now, this is a biggie. When you are going through your day and you are deciding, what should I do next? What should I work on? When you feel yourself gravitating to that easy task, that quick task, that one that you can cross off quicker than the others.

    Challenge yourself and think is this going to get me closer to my goal faster than if I chose something off my leap list? I might not be able to cross it off by the end of the day. However, if I cross it off by the end of the week because I’ve been working on it consistently, it’s going to propel me forward.


    Those are my tips for you. This is why mindset matters. I’d love to hear your thoughts so do let me know in the comments. I’d love to know where it is that you are getting stuck or what it is that you’re fighting against in your mindset and why it’s keeping you stuck in the same place. Or the tips that you’ve got to propel yourself forward. So let me know in the comments.

    If you’d like to grab your FREE MASTERCLASS on how you’re blocking your own success click here.

  • Blog, mindset

    5 signs that you’re holding yourself back

    This week I’m answering this question:

    “Everything’s going great at the moment, but I always get the feeling that I’m holding myself back in some way…can you help?”

    This is a common question, and it really doesn’t matter where you are on your leadership journey I can pretty much guarantee that we’ve all done this at some point or another.

    The thing is that our brain loves to keep us in our comfort zone. Now although you might think this is a pretty rubbish thing for it to do, it does have great intentions.The reason being is that when we’re in our comfort zone it knows that we’re safe – and after all that’s its primary objective to keep us alive. Now the problem comes that when we start to push the boundaries of our comfort zone it might start to try and nudge us back in and it can do that in so many different ways. This doesn’t mean that we shouldn’t try and stretch, but it does mean that we need to recognise when we start to hold ourselves back so that it doesn’t stop us from progressing.

    So, here are 5 signs that you’re holding yourself back…

    1. We hide behind being busy

    Being busy is a common problem, but it can also be a really good hiding place to stop you from doing anything outside of your comfort zone. You might say or think things like ‘Oh I’d love to do that but I’ve no time.’ ‘I’ve got loads on at the minute’ ‘I’ll do it when this [project finishes; or things calm down a bit]’

    If this is you: Have a think about whether you’re using being busy as a hiding place, or whether you genuinely are too busy at the moment, and be honest with yourself. If it’s the former, it’s time to look at how you can make space for new opportunities.

    2. You have an excuse

    We can all come with excuses why we don’t want to do something, but are you coming up with an excuse to stop yourself from having a go at something new? For example – do you say things like…I’ll do it tomorrow; I’m too busy right now; I’m too [fill in the gap here eg – old, young, inexperienced, not been here long enough; not got the right or enough qualifications etc]

    If this is you: Next time you hear yourself saying one of your excuses question whether it’s actually the case, or whether it’s just a myth? Do you really need a degree to do whatever it is? Are you really too young or too old? and so on.. chances are it’s not a valid reason to not have a go.

    3. We get annoyed with ourselves later

    Have you ever had the opportunity to do something, and you’ve said no and then kicked yourself later? If so, this is a clear sign that you’re holding yourself back.

    If this is you: Tune in to how you’re feeling at the time and take a moment to listen to yourself. Ask yourself do you just need to have a go? Or do you need more information? Or are you going to regret it if you don’t have a go?

    4. You push other people and not yourself

    You tell yourself that you want to give other people around you the opportunity instead – and it’s good for them to have a go, rather than you. You’re very good at side stepping opportunities so your team, friends, peers etc can do it instead.

    If this is you: Ask yourself whether you’re doing it for the right reasons. Are you genuinely wanting to develop other people? Or are you really passing it over because you’re not ready? If it’s the latter it might be time to take the leap too.

    5. You feel the fear

    Fear is a really common way that our brain uses to hold us back, and it works because it feels so rubbish that it’s not surprising we run for the hills when we feel it.

    If this is you: Have a go at recognising that all that’s happening is you’re stretching your comfort zone and that you’re not really in any danger. It also helps to know that this fear is only temporary and that pretty soon whatever you’re doing will become normal and no longer scary.

     

    So I’d love to know your thoughts and experiences on holding yourself back let me know by leaving a comment.

  • Blog, mindset

    9 ways to give your confidence a much needed boost

    This week I’m answering a question about confidence…

    “I feel as though I my confidence has gone – any ideas how I can get it back?”

    The thing is that we all have lapses in confidence as we go a long. The way I visualise it is that confidence is like a big jug of water. Sometimes it feels like it’s over flowing, sometimes it’s nearly empty and sometimes it’s somewhere in between – but no matter where it is you can always fill it up – it doesn’t have to be gone forever.

    Just knowing this really does help, because when we feel like our confidence has gone our gut reaction is to mourn this loss and worry about how we’ll be able to manage without it. But here’s the thing. You really don’t have to. There are ways to give your confidence a much boost.

    Decide what area of your life you’d like more confidence in.

    Your gut reaction here might be to say – all of it. But if you really drill it down there’s bound to be one area that you’d choose over the others. Choosing one to focus on will really help you to stop feeling overwhelmed as you try to tackle everything all at once.

    Once you’ve chosen try and be specific. Why do you feel you need more confidence? Is there something that’s currently going wrong or is it a feeling you’re getting? Decide what does success look like for you and scribble this down.

    Make it an experiment to take the pressure off

    By making this process an experiment it really does take the pressure off as all of a sudden there is no failure only learning. Keep a log of what you do and the results that you get, remembering to keep tweaking as you go (just as you would if it was a scientific experiment) rather than giving up if something didn’t turn out as you’d hoped.

    Accept that fear may not just disappear

    Everyone is different, and for you the fear or lack of confidence may not disappear immediately or over night, and it might take a bit of time, but this shouldn’t be a reason to give up. Your fear is just a feeling that’s all, and it may help to make friends with it and explain that you realise it’s there for a reason but you have to plough on anyway. Simply visualising your fear may help in itself and don’t forget to take some good deep breaths as you go.

    Decide what you’re going to do differently

    Start small and pick something that you’re going to do slightly differently or that you’re going to do more of and look for opportunities to do just that. For example – you may want more confidence when speaking to groups so look for opportunities to speak in front of people.

    Look at areas of your life where you’re really confident

    Yes you might think that you need to boost your confidence in all aspects of your life, but chances are that there’s one part where you’re rocking it. It doesn’t matter where this is – you might be really confident in a hobby, with your family, or even feel amazingly confident when you’re out doing something you love. Whatever it is write down how this feels and lock it in. This is the feeling that you’re aiming for (and you need to remember) when you’re working on building your confidence somewhere else.

    Get some feedback

    Sometimes we might not think we come across as confident, but other people aren’t picking up on a that at all. So, get some feedback. Ask your friends, peers, and team how you come across in specific situations and see what they say. You may be pleasantly surprised.

    Go looking for praise

    We all need a bit of reassurance from time to time. If you’re doing something outside of your comfort zone ask people for feedback after the event and ask them to tell you what you did well. I know it might seem self indulgent but here’s the thing – if you know what you did well, you can do more of that – plus it feels great to get some praise which really will help your confidence levels.

     Visualise the end result

    Rather than picturing what you think is going to go wrong, or what you’ve done badly in the past stay focused on how amazing the end result is going to be.  This will trick your brain into thinking you’re a lot more confident before you start.

     Go easy on yourself

    We all have lapses in confidence from time to time so go easy and forgive yourself. This doesn’t mean that you ‘don’t have confidence’ so don’t describe yourself in this way. Instead describe yourself as someone who is confident and more than capable to do something because you really can.

     BONUS TIP – Keep practicing

    It’s so easy to give up on something because it was tough or you really felt the fear. But keep at it – because every small step is a step in the right direction.

    I’d love to hear your thoughts – let me know by leaving a comment.