5 ways to make change happen
At the end of last month we had a big change happen in our house.
Our second child went to university – and although we’ve still got two left at home, all of a sudden the house felt empty and A LOT quieter!!
As we drove home from dropping him off, Dave and I couldn’t help having the inevitable conversation of…
”what do we do with his room?”
No, only kidding!!
How our life was changing. Our kids are growing up. Our third child is planning to go to university next year and then there’ll be just one left. Our holidays will be different, and even our food shopping will be different…it felt strange, empty and just not the same.
Just not the same.
Four words that I’ve heard people say a lot. When change happens we’re hardwired to spend some time hankering after the old, the familiar, and when things were better because we knew them.
‘Better the devil you know’ and all that.
But the thing is that change is not only inevitable, it’s vital and healthy, and change allows us to grow in ways we never even thought possible.
As I’m sat writing this outside it’s blowing a gale. The leaves are being whipped up into a frenzy and it feels like change is on the move – even nature dedicates a whole season to prepping for change and allowing for the new.
Change can so often be a good thing. I’m sure I’m not alone in this but when I look back over my life…when anything amazing has happened it always came as a result of something changing.
- A new job and new opportunities as a result of a redundancy.
- A new relationship as a result of an old one ending.
- A new experience as a result of doing something different or switching up an existing routine.
The list goes on.
Change allows us to grow, to evolve and to get involved in things that are interesting, and exciting. Things that will light us up and give us something new to ‘get our teeth stuck into’.
The problem is that more often than not we get stuck in the here and now, and don’t actively look for anything new, instead expecting it to fall into our laps.
So if you’re feeling like you’re ready for something new. Something different. A bit of a shakeup… then read these five tips so you’re not only ready, but you can spot that perfect opportunity to make change happen when it comes along.
It’s hard to be ready for anything new when we’re firmly planted in the past. This is where decluttering comes in – as it not only allows us to physically get rid of the things we’ve got around us that are dragging us back, but it’s a great way of making space for anything new that comes along.
A Personal story: When my old relationship ended I was a single mum for a while. However, I always knew that I’d find my perfect partner so I made space for him. Sounds daft, but it worked. I cleared out half of the wardrobe (and learnt to live with just one half) and I cleared out the bed side cabinet on ‘his’ side of the bed. As I figured that when he came along I’d be ready. (Side note – he did come a long and we’ve now been married for 11 years!)
Clear out those old files, tidy your desk out, clear out the files on your laptop, do some shredding, get rid of some of your old clothes and stuff…you’ll feel so much better because whilst you’re at it, you’ll be clearing your head of all the old stuff too. In order to make change happen, you have to be ready.
See things as a positive
It’s so easy, when you’re feeling a bit stuck in a rut and not stretched, to see everything as ‘MEH’ – but the time has come to give your thinking a bit of a shake up too. When you’re thinking and feeling a bit down, everything will seem a bit down, and this will leak out of your whole being. Pretty soon, everyone will know how you’re feeling.
Instead try and put a positive spin on things. Write a list of what you’re enjoying about where you are right now, and an even longer list of what you really want. What would light you up and make you giddy again? Once you know what you’re looking for it’ll be easy to find it.
Look at the present, or the future – but not the past
Ah everything in the past was amazing wasn’t it? The good old days!
Ever had a moment reminiscing with your work colleagues about how things used to be?
“We had so much fun…”
And although it’s nice to spend a few minutes having a wander down memory lane, it’s best if you don’t try and move back in.
The thing is, the past always looks a bit rosy when it’s come and gone. At the time it was probably as challenging as it is now. So, when you find yourself hankering after how things used to be look forwards at where you’re heading and visualise what success looks like for you.
Listen to yourself
Secretly, deep down inside you know exactly what you want and need. You’re just not paying attention. Spend some time listening to what you really want. How do you feel? What are your feelings telling you? What aren’t you admitting to? Or making excuses for? It’s perfectly natural to look for answers from other people or even ‘Google’ but more often than not the best answers come from you. So, take yourself out for a quiet walk. Sit on a bench and listen to what change you really need…and want.
Say yes to change
This is the hardest part of them all. Saying yes! But here’s the thing. Unless you start to say yes to things that come your way, you may never know where it might lead and what you might learn along the way.
I’d love to know your thoughts on how you can make change happen – let me know by leaving a comment – and if you haven’t signed up to come along to my free monthly workshops – it’d be great to have you there. Just fill in the form below and you’ll be added to the invite list.